We lost our trust

by Jesse Jane
(CA)

He was controlling and lacked self-esteem, but we had the best passion ever. We had a blended family and both tried hard to be the best parents possible.

Money was an issue. We did everything separate. He had everything in his name, wouldn’t share, and was not supportive of my education. I was a dancer at a Las Vegas nightclub when we met and he has been an owner of a club so we both knew the business. He went to work out of the business and I stayed in.

He became very insecure and I became very irritated with him. We grew angry at each other and went through a very messy Divorce. Although we both seem to never be able to get each other off our minds.

Our children have settled into their lives and we seem to have a hard time saying goodbye even at Kindergarten roundup. He has had about 4 live-in relationships in the last 18 months and I have had one non committed one.

We both just can’t seem to get each other to give up.

Comments for We lost our trust

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We Lost Our Trust
by: Anonymous

Thank you for your kind reply. You are stronger than you think. You are better than he makes you feel. You deserve more than you receive.

I attend a counseling center at the Women's Resource Center, which is free of charge. These advocates are trained in dealing with many abuse issues and offer legal services, individual counseling, and group therapy. They (all the women) are helping me so much. So, please check your telephone book to check for a center near you. I think their expertise will help you to recognize and cope with your problems. Most importantly, they will help you to move on.

I hope you are well. Please ask for help. There are so many people who have been in your situation, and there are so many people who can help...if only you ask.

Thank you for the much needed advice.
by: jessejane

Thanks for the advice. I will get the book. I have started reading Mathew Kelly books and they have helped me tremendously. Hope you are doing well now. 30 years is like habit. U go girl.....

We Lost Our Trust
by: Anonymous

Well, I do understand your situation, but I cannot tell you what to do. Only you can decide that. However, I can say that controlling men never change. Oh, they say they will. They promise you the moon, the stars, and the sun....if only you will stay. But I have learned that men like these will never "give"; they will only take. They will never care...about your goals, your dreams, your hurts, or your problems. There is room in their world for only one person....themselves.

Passion is wonderful....but is that enough for you? Only you can answer that question. What more do you want? How much of that can he give you?

I would suggest that your read Lundy Bancroft's book WHY DOES HE DO THAT? It has been a valuable resource to me, and I think it would help you to assess your situation.

I wish you courage, strength, and wisdom.

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