He was a mommas boy

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He was a mommas boy

by Z. lugo
(NJ)

My ex was a momma’s boy who never cut the apron strings. His mom criticized me all the time because she thought I was too young for him. And he never stood up for me. After 18 years of marriage, I couldn’t take it anymore and filed papers for a divorce.

During our divorce he got engaged to be remarried. He did not want parental custody of the three kids, but fought with me about his pension and refused to pay alimony. I could not afford a really good attorney, and was not advised that he could have to pay for my attorney’s service. During the settlement of my divorce, my attorney told me that he could not continue to come to court unless I was willing to pay more money. I was in such duress that I walked away from the alimony and the pension, and settled on child support only.

Well, now I am losing my house. My kids are college students, not full time but unemployed and he stopped paying child support. When I filed for a motion --I could not afford to send it certified so it was hand delivered, he did not show up. In the meanwhile I have had no income for the past two months and had to apply for food stamps, seek help from the local churches to help pay my utilities, and received food from the food pantry.

My ex is a homicide detective earning about 105K with all the overtime he wants, yet he refuses to help out. He feels that he’s done enough and I should take any job and figure it out myself. I lost it and told him to take all three kids. I am not going to be homeless and then have him take the kids, so just take them now.

Can I modify the decree to get the pension I gave away for the custody of the kids? He has money and I am not able to provide for myself. I should not be put on the street after 18 year of marriage. He drove me insane, turning all my kids against me and making them promises of a new car and my 20 year daughter her own apartment which he is willing to pay for. My youngest child is special needs. He is taking my kid away from me to give to the woman who hates me for marrying her son.

How can I survive this nightmare? How can one person be so hateful and want to hurt the mother of his kids?

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He was a mommas boy

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My ex was a mama's boy too
by: Anonymous

"My ex was a momma’s boy who never cut the apron strings. His mom criticized me all the time because she thought I was too young for him. And he never stood up for me. After 18 years of marriage, I couldn’t take it anymore and filed papers for a divorce."

That's pretty much the same situation for me. I divorced him and it was finalized this month. Not only did he not stand up for me, he wanted his parents to live with us forever. They had stayed with us for 6 months. When they are around, noone else exists. Whatever mommmy says, that's law in her son's eyes. I was tossed aside like a 3rd class citizen. I couldn't stand it and it was the longest 6 months of my life. I feel like I am better off now. At times I still get really frustrated thinking about because he honestly made me believe and think I was a bad human being. I know how you feel.

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You can do it yourself!
by: Anonymous

You don't need a lawyer to file motions. All the information and forms are on the internet for your discovery to get back what you lost. Depending on the amount of time that has past since General Judgement is what will determine the direction you will need to go first.

All the information is also available on the internet. You may feel that you need an attorney to protect you, but you don't. You just need to know who you are. "Fire when fired upon". You are the one who knows everything. This automatically gives you upper-hand in a win win situation for yourself and your grown children.

You can do it. I am not an attorney and so far since August I have won everything in my divorce.
ExM's Attorney is at this very moment attempting to modify the temporary child and spousal support award. The psycho husband hasn't given his 4 children or me a penny and is now 3 months in arrears. I also won exclusive possession and Ex is ordered to get house out of arrears and pay all the Dental surgery cost for his 7 & 5 yr. old.

Like I said, "You Can Do It" - "Get it all Back & more" - GO FOR IT AND LEARN WHO YOU ARE!
look up Joseph Prince - Singapore

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Dumbass
by: Anonymous

To sum is up, your husband is a total dumbass..

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P.U.S.H
by: Marcus A.

First I want to say that I am sorry to here your unfortunate story. I think that your ex is wrong for not assisting you with your needs and turning your kids who you BIRTH against you. I don't have any legal advice for you but I can tell you what works for me and what I recommend for you is to P.U.S.H. P.U.S.H stands for Pray Until Something Happens. I will pray that everything works out for you and that you get the answer that you are looking for. You deserve much better than what he is giving you and I am pretty sure you will find it.

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divorce problem
by: Anonymous

i got divorced my ex-husband did n't love me he left me now i am better but i am thinking what is my problem? what could i do and i didn't amn't i good enough? and i confused about my Emotions somtimes i hate hime sometimes i miss him i blame myself about my mistake and i can't forgive first my self second others also i have another problem too it make me annoyed when i think about the sex that i have had

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yes u correct some extent
by: rajeev ranjan shahi

your concern is possession of one man by two women but on your matter you should have proved your self that you r only a women who is maid for your ex and according to your grievance matter was not very serious , if except it there are different issue which was not disclosed and on reason of that situation you have taken a decision of apart and you r not feeling lack of company of your ex so this one is very good , on your situation law is fully supported for alimony

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Leave that man
by: Anonymous

It's good that you leave that guy.He is worthless.As for you,I hope that you can make through this awful experience.Wishing you the best always.

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You're not alone
by: Anonymous

I empathize with you - my "husband" is the same way. I was empowered by my therapist that I was acting like the victim. And I was. Instead of being depressed about his actions towards me, I was given ideas of how to take his control away. He didn't like that at all. I don't know you're entire situation, but hold your head up, look for help (they YWCA has legal advisors), and do not let him know that you are in his control, you only give him more power over you. Do some research online, call lawyers, some will give you info pro bono. Take back control of your life. You will feel so much better. You can do it, stop thinking that you "can't" do this or that because you CAN! There is a domestic violence group on Face Book called H.O.P.E., where they will help you. But you have to do the work yourself. They will supply you with information and support. God Bless you, and you WILL get through this. I'm not yet through it, only begining with the first few steps. Been married 31 years next month. I wish I had seen the emotional abuse much earlier, ie; supporting his mother instead of me, I am imagining it, all in my head, etc, etc. Remember that you are NOT the only one going through this and there are ppl out there that do care.

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move on
by: Anonymous

I agree with ano. That guy is a real wiener!
I feel sorry for you Z :(.Hope that you can make it through.

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He's a real "wiener"
by: Anonymous

My story is similar where I had my own house before we married. He did as well. My profits were put into another house, and finally, a house over our heads, but he was bound and determined to keep it. Turns out, using my money from the house I had before. He acts like its a 50/50 split and lies right to my eyes of car parts sold that were his he had stored in an attic at his gradmothers (I lived there too, and there is no attic.) All parts were acquired during our marriage. How they can ruthlessly lie to their childs mother. But my ex stepson's mother visited her son in MY house and spent the night. Wierd. I think my ex has never gotten over the cheating snake. I asked him who she slept with - he or his son (that's another saga to this nightmare). My new saying is, "You dont really know them until after a divorce." It's scary. I trust me, myself and I to get through this life thanks to the betrayal the last person I would suspect did. The small bit of property he tricked me to trade for a million dollar house is being tax defaulted as I had no clue he never paid the property taxes on it. He sold the classic cars we had and now says he had them before we married. Hes lying to someone who found the cars as we were partners. I'm beginning to think his son is a cover up for his real obsession - his ex. He dropped off some of my stuff and in the pile of pictures were his son, his sons school work from grade school and ceramic pottery his son made, as well as a picture of his first son, who passed in 1986 at 27 mos. old. He is too gung ho to even see his priceless photos being tossed out. I even had an envelope with his sons first hair cut. Im giving them to him with a note, mind you. Anyway, There is a court form called, "Motion to enforce judgment of decree". I finally found some form that suits my situation, it may be of interest to you as well. It requests a judge make a court date to order him to pay up his depts. It also gives you the opportunity to include anything he purposely left off the assets list. I wont give up as it is a lot of money hes trying to steal. Good luck to you, dont let the slime ball get away.

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He was a mommas boy

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He was a mommas boy