If this is your first Holiday Season after a divorce or the death of a spouse, rather than joy and excitement, you may be filled with sadness and trepidation.
With every Christmas Carol or Jewelry Commercial you suddenly find you are rolling your eyes and then a second later, sobbing uncontrollably! You are shocked that you can vacillate between cynical and sentimental in a Nano-second! Like the hurried holiday shoppers themselves, your emotions are pushing and shoving and rushing around slamming up against each other.
"Hey!" you shout at yourself, "I thought I was getting through all this stuff!"
RELAX. It is normal to feel things more intensely at the holidays. The infinite supply of cheese balls, chocolate, Carols and Cards only serve to ratchet up the nostalgia meter as a lifetime of both good and bad memories wash over you.
While emotions are often unpredictable and we can't help what we feel, here are some thoughts to consider that can make the holidays a little less painful and hopefully even a bit enjoyable!
You have control over how you spend your days. This includes holidays. What do you want to do with this day? If your children are older, discuss new ideas and options with them, keeping in mind that while their input is valuable, you are the parent and ultimately will choose what feels healthy and right for all of you.
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Getting through your first Christmas after divorce can be challenging. The following articles can help you make the most of it: