I Can't Afford A DivorceMany people feel that they simply can't afford a divorce because they don't have any savings and can't afford to hire a lawyer. There are ways to get a divorce, even if your funds are limited, as explained by the legal expert below:
Topic: He controls all the money. What can I do? Erin's Question: I have been married for 13 years, and am the mother of 4 kids under 12. I have no money and my financial situation has been controlled and destroyed by my husband for many years. Please let me know what I can do, or where I can go. Brette's Answer: There are a few ways to approach this. You can go see an attorney for a free consultation, then work out how you will find the money to pay for representation. You may be able to have attorney's fees paid by your husband. You can also call your local bar association and ask what free legal services are available in your area. Another option is to start custody and support proceedings in family court yourself without an attorney. This will allow you to receive some money on a regular basis from your spouse while you determine how you will file for a divorce. A third choice is to find out if your state has a self-help packet for divorce you could do on your own. Good luck. » Return to top Topic: Are there any services that offer free divorces? Alexis' Question: After being married for three years to an abusive man, I moved out. He owned everything, and I am left with no money or job and living with my parents again. Is there any services that offer free divorces? Brette's Answer: Call your local bar association and ask them to refer you to a low cost or no cost legal services program in your area. You could also obtain the pro se (which means "representing yourself") packet from your court and handle the divorce yourself. This works best if you are able to agree on how to divide your assets and debts. » Return to top Is there such a thing as a hardship divorce? Brooke's Question: I need to obtain a divorce, but have no money to pay a lawyer. Is there such a thing as a hardship divorce? Brette's Answer: There are a few options. You can represent yourself. You could file and seek "poor person" status. You fill out documents about your financial situation and ask the court to waive the fees. You can also ask that your spouse be required to pay the fees. Talk to the county clerk. Good luck. I can't afford a lawyer and I don't qualify for legal aid. Gloria's Question: I am 55 years old, disabled, and need a lawyer for a divorce. The problem is I can't afford a lawyer and legal aid can't help. I have been trying to find a Pro Bono lawyer in my area but haven't been able to. Is there help for women who can't afford a lawyer? Brette's Answer: I am so sorry to hear about your situation and unfortunately it is a common one. There are many, many, many people who do not have the resources to pay an attorney yet do not qualify for legal aid. Call your local or state bar association and ask if there is a volunteer lawyer program in your area. It is very common for attorney to donate a certain amount of their time to a local agency such as this and provide services for those who cannot afford them. If no such program exists, find out who the chair of the matrimonial or family law committee is on the local or state bar and call him or her up and ask if there are any local attorneys available to help people in your kind of situation. If all else fails, you may be able to find someone who can help you work out a payment plan. » Return to top Can I take money out of a joint account before I move out? Kathy's Question: I want a divorce from my husband, but I have no income. My husband and I have money in the bank. Can I legally withdraw one half of the balance before I move out? He's going to fight me on the divorce and this is the only way I know to get the money for legal fees. Brette's Answer: It is generally considered acceptable to withdraw half of the funds in a joint account when separating. Good luck. » Return to top Selling Property Before Filing For Divorce Shannon's Question: My husband and I are separated. Can I sell assets, since there has been no divorce filed for? Everything we own is in my name, but acquired during the marriage. Before I file for divorce, can I sell any of these assets to pay for the attorney? Brette's Answer: Anything you sell would be a marital asset and subject to division. Your attorney would advise you first that you shouldn't sell anything until you have some kind of agreement, and that if you do, you should put the money into a bank account where you don't touch it during the proceedings. However, if you have no other way to pay for an attorney, it would be reasonable to use your portion of those assets to pay for one. » Return to top Selling Personal Property Before Filing For Divorce Heather's Question: We have not filed for divorce yet. But I need some money to pay for the proceedings. Can I take my guns from the house to sell them for the money? Brette's Answer: If this is your separate property that you owned before marriage, absolutely. If it was acquired during marriage, it is a marital asset. That doesn't mean you can't sell it, but it does mean that it is likely the value of the items would be deducted from your portion of the remaining property as it is distributed. Should I get a joint credit card to help pay bills? Leigh's Question: My husband has financially cut me off, and my sister told me that I should take a credit card out in both of our names so that I can pay for my expenses. I feel this is wrong, but I also feel that he has left me no other choice. How will this look if he takes me to court, and what other options do I have? Brette's Answer: You can go to court and get temporary spousal and child support which will help you pay your bills. It's also likely the court will order your husband to pay your legal bills. I would not recommend doing anything fraudulent or illegal. Applying for credit in his name would be. » Return to top Topic: How To Survive When A Divorce Goes On Forever Betty's Question: I am 62 and going through a divorce for over a year now. When it started, I had no money because he controlled the finances and I had to use a pro bono lawyer. As it stands, I am living on $430 a month, while he takes trips to Hawaii and buys a new car. His attorney keeps postponing the court date, and I'm having a hard time surviving. Is there anything I can do to get this to change? Brette's Answer: Your attorney should seek an emergency temporary order of spousal support. There is no excuse for this and you should ask that it be done immediately. Good luck. » Return to top His lawyer won't send me the papers to sign until he's paid. Kristen's Question: Our split was a mutual decision and we have no children or assets together, so we had originally planned simply to file paperwork down at the courthouse without lawyers. After meeting someone and getting engaged, my ex felt that hiring a lawyer to handle it would be more efficient than doing it ourselves. Seven months later, he is refusing to pay his lawyer, and his lawyer has said that he won't send me any final papers to sign until he's paid. I really don't want to get stuck paying an $800 bill. Do I have any recourse? Brette's Answer: You're not responsible for paying his attorney, he is. You can go to the courthouse and find out where the case is at and handle it yourself from this point on.
Related Articles: Brette Sember is a former family and
matrimonial attorney and mediator, nationally recognized expert, and author of
many books including
The Divorce Organizer & Planner,
No-Fight Divorce, and
How To Parent With Your Ex.
This column provides general information about the various aspects of divorce. It is not intended to take the place of legal counsel and should not be considered personal legal advice. For specific recommendations concerning your situation, please retain experienced legal counsel. WomansDivorce.com and Brette Sember disclaim any liability from any claim arising from any information contained in this column. This column is not a substitute for legal advice. Divorce
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