Toxic Split After a Bad Marriage

by Merry
(St. Peters, MO )

We have all experienced the "honeymoon" phase. When you think this IS the one and he's so wonderful!! This was my second marriage. I was married almost 20 years the first time. I have been waiting for 18 months to finalize a divorce that should only should have taken maybe six months & cost a couple of grand. Oh my................we have spent more on attorney fees than we have value of marital property to split.

I found out from my mortgage company back last June that my house payment was 93 days past due and he had just sent March's payment in 2 days before that. Funny........I called them back right after I heard it the first time because I could not believe what I had heard. Another customer service rep. told me the same thing. I think I actually stopped breathing. My husband was responsible for the mortgage payment and I was responsible for the utilities, groceries & etc. It worked out about 50/50. He tried to lie about it when I confronted him!! I tried to work with him, catch up payments, etc. but by August I could not live like this anymore.

I forced him out of the house and sat there until January when I had to leave due to foreclosure. This was like a "death" knowing I was going to lose my home (and my daughter’s home for 17 years). This was my home that my husband moved into, that I opened my door & heart to share with him.

He moved into a fully furnished home sitting on beautiful acreage and started taking the minute his shoes were under the bed. He liked to spend $$ on himself. He bought Harleys, the best of hunting equipment, took trips with the guys, etc. We went on trips but it was always with a group and where he wanted to go....

I've lost my job during this past 18 months. Thank God my parents were able to help me put a roof over my head. I'm grateful to still have my 19 year old furniture & my puppies. Miss Lacy is a 9 year old yellow lab and Bella is a 2 year old Bichon. If it wasn't for their love & devotion I'm not sure I'd even be half sane. My parents have both worked very hard all of their life and might seem comfortable to some financially but they are just regular people who were smart with their money/investments/business.

He has actually tried to go after my parent’s money. He has brought them into the divorce as a 3rd party trying to prove my name is on their money, property, business, vehicles, etc. WHO DOES THIS??? He has tried to put me in jail numerous times over marital property I have in my possession. WHO DOES THIS??

I cannot wait until May. My attorney assures me this nightmare will be final then. I just want my soul & sanity back. This toxic relationship seems like it will never end...........

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