He was mean, abusive, and always high
I would imagine that my tittle says it all; and yes, those are all true. Alcoholism, substance abuse, physical and emotional abuse, porn addiction, and cheating all led to the breakup of my marriage.
The bigger question is, "Why did I stay so long?"
I filed for divorce 2 weeks short of our twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. I was unhappy for a long time and did not even like him anymore. He was mean, abusive, and always high and drunk. Not a good partner for sure.
Through wonderful post-separation therapy, I discovered that he was a true narcissist. He fit the profile to a "T". He had no self-esteem, could take no criticism, but dished it out by shovelfuls. He had big addiction issues and justified all he did to serve himself well. Not to mention his need to control...especially me.
One of the last straws occurred about a week before he was arrested for domestic violence, and I filed for divorce was.....he took the door off our master bathroom. He said my showers steamed up the bathroom and since I did not follow his "rule" of keeping the door opened when I showered, he took it off.
That really hit me hard. It sent me into motion. I used to hate him, now I pity him.......and am so happy for my peaceful life. I have tons of stories about his abusive and irrational behavior; but if you feel you were married to a narcissist, please share with me. Thanks.