Parenting Plan Modifications
Parenting plan modifications usually occur when there is a change in circumstances, such as one parent moving away, a child custody change, or a change in the visitation schedule. Major modifications occur when there is a change in custody, and minor modifications center more around visitation schedule changes. If both parents agree to the changes to the parenting plan, it is fairly simple to get to get the agreement changed. If there is disagreement over the changes, then the parents will need to go back to court to prove that there is an adequate change in the circumstances to warrant modifying the parenting plan. The following questions about parenting plan modifications can help you understand what is involved in the process of modifying your parenting agreement.
Does a temporary parenting plan affect the final arrangements? Ella's Question: We have a temporary parenting plan where he gets the kids every other weekend and on Wednesdays. They spend a lot of time at his mother's, and she was beating them (when the order specifically stated "NO Corporal Punishment"). She also left them alone one night until midnight, which I can prove. Does the temporary plan usually carry over into a permanent one once the divorce is final? Brette's Answer: The temporary plan is temporary. If you have a custody hearing, the judge will examine all the evidence and decide what is best for the children. It is important that you have all the facts in your favor presented to the court, which means calling witnesses and presenting any physical evidence. For example, if your mother-in-law physically harms your children, take photos of any marks on their skin. Get an attorney if possible. » Return to top What happens to a parenting plan when circumstances change? Sheila's Question: In our divorce agreement, it says that if the mother is working night shift, the minor child shall stay with the father. What happens if I quit my job? Brette's Answer: In this type of situation the parties should either negotiate another plan that allows reasonable visitation, or the father would need to file a petition alleging a change of circumstances and asking the court to create a new visitation plan. What should we do if he can't follow the original parenting plan? Patricia's Question: My husband has a parenting plan that he is unable to follow. He is supposed to keep the kids on Friday nights and every other weekend. However there was a change in his income and he is in school Monday-Friday and at work Friday to Sunday nights in order to keep up with child support. What can we do so he won't get in trouble for not being able to keep the kids? Brette's Answer: The first thing is to talk to the mom to see if you can work something out. Maybe you could have them some week day evening each week or during the day on a weekend. Talk to her and see what works. If she is inflexible, your husband can ask for a modification from the court. Good luck. » Return to top Is he in contempt if he's not following the parenting plan? Jill's Question: We have joint legal and physical custody of our 4 yr old daughter. She will be starting school next year and in our parenting plan we agreed she would go to the school district he resides in. He picked up the enrollment papers but refuses to let me see them. She was also due for her checkup and shots and I found out he took her to a different doctor without letting me know or be there. As a mother it is very important to me that I attend my children's checkups. Is he in contempt? He has been using her as "the messenger" ever since we split up and says negative things about me in front of her. Please, please give any advice. Brette's Answer: This is not contempt, but a violation of the joint parenting plan. You must make decisions jointly. By closing you out, he's violating that order. It sounds like what you really need is a mediation session, or a joint counseling session where you can get back to being on the same page again. It does sound like he's forgotten some important parenting skills. You can certainly go back to court and have the judge tell him again decisions must be joint. What if he violates the provision not to introduce significant others? Kari's Question: My ex and I created a parenting plan that was filed with our divorce decree. It says that he cannot introduce a significant other in social situations until 6 months after the divorce. If he does this prior to the 6 months, is there anything enforceable or consequences for not following parenting plan guidelines or is it a waste of time to even pursue it since 6 months is only 1 month away? Brette's Answer: You would certainly be within your rights to enforce it, but I think you are wise to ask yourself the point of doing so - particularly when you consider how long it would take to actually get before a judge. If your kids are not being put in a bad situation, there is little harm being done (except for the fact that he's violating a court order and violating your trust, which I do understand is a concern). Good luck. How can I revoke visitation until he is drug-free? Fiona's Question: I already have custody of my daughter, although my ex has visitation. I left him because he was into cocaine... he told me he was clean so I allowed a visitation agreement, as long as she was not staying there over night. I have recently discovered he is back into it and possibly selling it. What steps do I take to revoke visitation till he's clean? Brette's Answer: You'll have to go back to court for a modification of the order. You can ask for drug testing as well. Can the non-custodial parent get a modification requiring drug testing? Nicole's Question: I am the non-custodial parent, and at the time of my divorce I had a criminal charge pending (2 possession charges). In our agreement, there is a stipulation that my ex-husband (for two years following the decree signing) can order random drug screening. It has come to my attention that he is not exactly citizen of the year, and I would also like him to have to submit such a test. Can my decree be modified to include me having the same right as him, to test him randomly? Brette's Answer: I think it's unlikey the court is going to agree to this since you have a prior record for this and he doesn't. I think you're better to just get through the two years and go through the tests if you have nothing to hide. » Return to top Can the custody order be changed to be more specific? June's Question: We joint physical custody of our 2 year old daughter and we have a court order that is basic and does not spell out vacation, school or holidays or travel (which my ex won't allow). Every issue has to be resolved by the court, if the judge does not order it, he will not comply. Dealing with him is very stressful, there is no compromise with him, everything has to be his way. Can I go back to court to ask that the order be change? Brette's Answer: Yes definitely and this should have been taken care of by now. The court does not want you to come back for every little thing. Get an order in place that spells absolutely everything out. I would recommend you hire an attorney and sit down and make a very comprehensive list of absolutely everything AND chart it out on a calendar so that actual dates can be inserted. Good luck. Can the plan be modified to include a provision for attending church? Shandy's Question: We have a parenting time order that was recently put in place. In court he told the judge that if he got weekend overnight visitation he would allow me to pick our son up for church since my religion is very important to me. Now that the order is in place, he won't allow me to pick our son up for church since it doesn't specify it in the order. Is this enough to ask for a modification to the court order? Brette's Answer: Yes, you could seek to modify the order to include this. It's not a big change so it should not be a problem. How can I get a parenting plan changed? Fawn's Question: I am fighting a battle with my ex over our parenting plan. In the plan, he has the kids 6 nights a week, whereas I only get one. I feel that this is effecting them emotionally. Can I have the parenting plan changed? Brette's Answer: You can always ask to have the plan changed, but you'll need to convince the court that a change is in the best interest of the children. You may need to have a therapist testify about the impact on them. Talk to an attorney. » Return to top What happens if he won't agree to the new visitation schedule? Laura's Question: My new husband and I want to buy a house 40 miles away from my ex-husband. My ex and I share joint legal custody. We currently share residence a week on and a week off. The move would require a change to 3 weekends a month and the majority of summers, school holidays and other school time off. I've been able to get it to 45/55. My ex is willing to discuss it, but what could happen if he doesn't agree to the new schedule? Brette's Answer: Then you have to either mediate it or go to court and ask the judge to decide. What if the judge made changes to the parenting plan we didn't want? Carol's Question: We just got an order from a district court involving our parenting time schedule. In the original divorce decree both parents were granted 50% joint custody and have been living this way for almost 4 years. In an attempt to make the decree more detailed with a set schedule we went to court. Now the judge made an order that took parenting time away from one parent which changes the equal custody that was previously agreed upon. Neither party even asked for a change in custody only different set schedules. We are devastated and need some advice on what to do. Can we appeal the order? Can we ask to talk to the judge about his decision to see if there was a typo or an error? Also, he didn't even rule on the first right of refusal which was one of the larger issues in our court case. Any help would be so greatly appreciated. Brette's Answer: I think you should see a mediator and work this out yourselves. You can then submit a stipulation to the court with your agreement. Unfortunately, this is why the court systems is not always best equipped to decide these things - the judges simply don't have time to understand every last detail in the case. Meet with a mediator (you can probably do this in just an hour or two) and work out your unresolved issues and keep the other things the way you had them. In the meantime, if you both agree, you're free to alter the schedule to fit your needs, as long as you are both in agreement. » Return to top Can I appeal the judges ruling? Tasha's Question: My ex filed a petition for more visitation (we agreed to let him have every weekend). My daughter was recently diagnosed with leukemia and she is only 7 months old. He came the first week and a half and then stopped. I have been at the hospital 24/7 with her and learning everything I need to know for when we go home! We just went to the final hearing Wednesday and the judge gave him an extra day so now it's basically split. He had a lawyer and I didn't. He doesn't know how to properly care for her if we were to go home now. Am I capable of fighting this or appealing this? Brette's Answer: Appeals are based on whether the judge made a mistake of law, not on whether you were able to present your case. None of what happened makes sense to me though. He hasn't been exercising visitation yet the judge gave him more? If she needs special care and he doesn't know how to give it, you should file a petition to modify this order. This time get an attorney if at all possible. Would the parenting plan be revised due to his work schedule? Karen's Question: It was agreed that my son's father and I would parent 50/50. My son has spent more time with me even though we have this verbal agreement and I make most of the decisions. His father now works as a flight attendant whose hours and days of work vary from week to week and month to month. He has proposed following his work schedules as a way of determining the parenting schedule. I feel this is unreasonable because of the demands it makes on my lifestyle and how it discontinues the routine my son is used to. How would a mediator or judge view the occupation of a flight attendant and is it reasonable for us all to follow his work schedules? Brette's Answer: The question is not how it affects your lifestyle, but how it affects your son. You didn't mention his age, and that is important. It's important that your son have a relationship with his father. There are plenty of children who have parenting schedules that change. The only question is how it will affect your son. » Return to top Can visitation be revised to take the activities into consideration? Kathleen's Question: My ex is now having to pay child support for the first time in 3 years. Because of this, he is now stating the kids have to visit with him every time it is his time. He never had a problem with missed time due to sporting activities or birthday parties before the child support. Now he is threatening that our son cannot attend his varsity practices if they fall on his weekends (he lives 2 hours away). Can father interfere with his life in such a way, or can visitation be revised? Brette's Answer: You can file a petition to modify the plan. It's important that the kids be permitted to do their activities. Ask that a Law Guardian or Guardian ad litem be appointed to represent their interests. Can I get visitation increased if I'm the non-custodial parent? Janet's Question: Due to a felony 5 years ago, I received 5 years probation; and my two children we taken away from me and placed with their father. I was given supervised visitation once a month. It costs me $600 to travel and stay in the city where my ex and my children live. I therefore do not have the money to hire an attorney to try and get more visitations with my children. Can I get more time with my children and should my ex-spouse bear some of the visitation costs? Brette's Answer: I think it is worth a try to ask for more time. If you've completed your probation and have created a good life for yourself, a court would certainly listen to your argument. You need to show not only that you haven't gotten in trouble again but that you have a stable life with a job, home, and support system. You need to be able to present a good plan to the court for how you would spend time with your children. There's nothing unreasonable about asking your ask to help with the cost of visitation. Have you thought about moving closer to them? » Return to top Copyright WomansDivorce.com. All rights reserved. Related Questions: Related Articles:
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