He was a bully.

by Anonymous

You wouldn’t believe what a jerk my husband can be. He bullies everyone, including our own children. When they were toddlers and learning to walk, he would purposely make them trip or knock them down because he thought it was funny. He would tell me I was stupid and never had anything worthwhile to say. He would even tell other people "don't listen to her, she's stupid". He demanded I have dinner ready for him, and that I bring it to him on the couch instead of coming to the table. IF he had a bad day, it was taken out on me. He spent food and diaper money on cigarettes and refused to let me drive the car. I had to beg for simple privileges like going to the library or to doctor's appointments.

And he was charming, so charming. We'd fight, he would scream and yell and throw things, and then he would turn it off, instantly, and somehow convince me that I was being unreasonable. And I would buy it.

One day, after a fight where he threw my laptop across the room. I quietly texted my mother, and while he was a work, I moved myself and the children out. He was shocked, blindsided, and to this day expects me to come back. I can't talk to him for more than five minutes at a time because he turns on that famous charm and starts to make me think I was wrong, but I know if I go back there will be hell to pay for the embarrassment I caused him.

Comments for He was a bully.

Post reply

Violence and mental illness
by: Anonymous

I have been married for thirteen years. My husband was 21 when I married him. He was straight out of prison. When I met him he was very charming. He talked about being released from prison after serving three years for something he didn't do. He spent a lot of time with me when I had no one. The cheating and the abuse started early but I took on the blame. I said the wrong things or I said the right things the wrong way. He has cheated on me, burned me with hot water, kicked, bit and punched me, poked me with knives, but I stayed. He couldn't help it after all, he was mentally ill. After all these years of physical and mental abuse, I’m out. But I am so scared.

Don't Go Back!!
by: Anonymous

I finally took my life back after years of emotional and physical abuse from my husband. We were married for almost 8 years and I never knew when he would get angry at me. He isolated me from my mom, family, and friends so I couldn’t get any support. Trust me; the physical abuse doesn't happen suddenly. It starts from words and emotional control, then the physical abuse comes next. Wake up, Ladies! Life goes on and is too precious to waste on a bad man. Get out while you still can!!!

Domestic Violence
by: Anonymous

My husband is an abuser, both physically and emotionally. He beat me up in front of my kids and calls me names. He does not allow me to talk to anyone. I know what you've went through.

I thought he was serious when he would beg me not to leave
by: Anonymous

I got married at the age of 22 in an arranged marriage. Right from the beginning he was suspicious, controlling and insecure. I always felt that I am in a cage and that I am running away from someone and he is chasing me. I felt that I am in a prison and that there is always a strict surveillance 24/7 there is no room to breathe.

Finally a savior came into my life in the form a counselor, my spiritual advisor and made me aware of my suffering. I did not even know how I was being abused. I thought unless I am beaten up I am alright. I was abused spiritually, emotionally, financially, sexually, socially, psychologically, and verbally. Until I sought help, I was like a puppet to him.

When I raised my voice against that oppression and abuse he started to fight with me, finding faults with me, and alleging me with all kinds of things one can think of. I did not have any affair with the counselor, but since he was helping me, my husband made it appear like it was an affair. Every time I would or we would decide on divorce he would beg me not to leave and that he would behave and would mend his ways. I thought he was serious and worked hard on fixing myself and improving myself in the relationship.

But that was a big lie, a fraud, a huge betrayal. He was just buying time to line up his kids, his finances, society and his job. When he got ready, he made my life hell to let me live in that house. I was so devastated and even lost my job because he collaborated with my boss and got me fired.
I left my house in order to protect my life and sanity. I fled to a monastery and lived there for three years.

My children got me out of the monastery and now I am back in the society and filed for divorce.
Now the lawyers are telling me that I do not have enough evidence against him and cannot allege him for any abuse. My lawyer, despite my telling him about all the abuses I went through, filed a no fault case. I am frustrated as I have no job, no money, no maintenance give to me so far, and no societal support.

Post reply

Share Your Reasons For Divorce.