He isolated himself

by Marie

I’m divorcing him but I don't want to divorce his family . . . .


My divorce will be final soon & I'm scared of the unknown but happy to start a new life. I have no family other than my daughter & father. My husband on the other hand has what seems like 50,000 family members & I love the majority of them. He has isolated himself from them. One aunt in particular sent him several text asking how he was doing. She did this before she knew about our divorce and asked him to call her because she hadn't heard from him in a while. This aunt help raise him so they are/were very close.

She was so worried about him that she came over to the house to check up on him, but he didn't open the door so she left a note on his truck. I paid her a visit this past weekend & she showed me a text he wrote her stating that he doesn't want to speak to her or anyone else. He wants nothing to do with them and to leave him alone. I was embarrassed and apologized to her because he is taking out his frustrations out on the people who aren't hearing from him and don't know about the divorce. He assumes they are being nosey but that is not the case. I have tried to tell him but he refuses to listen.

Our daughter and I are very close to his family. We always have been because even when he didn't go with us to birthday parties or family gatherings, we went. They are being very protective of my daughter and me, but I feel bad that he is isolating himself from his family and they didn't do anything to him. Right now, I am not ready to detach myself from his family because they accepted me from day one. I don't if he is isolating himself from them because I am so close to them & he doesn't want to hear their advice.

I know the day will come when they will start to step away from me and that day will be very difficult for me. I'm sure I will survive, but I hate to lose them all. I'm not sure if I am dealing with this family situation the correct way or if I should cut all ties with them. I do have a daughter that will bond me forever with him and his family and I want her to be around her entire family.

Comments for He isolated himself

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Ohana
by: Kalani

It sounds like we have similar situations. I told my favorite sisters in my husband's family that I want to stay connected if/when I leave my husband. They know they are my family, and we are sisters now and forever. I believe that that won't change, even though my soon to be ex-husband isn't estranged from them.

Since you are accepted as part of the family, tell them how you feel. Maybe they won't push you out, especially since your husband is not engaged. A true family is ohana. "Ohana means family, and family means no one gets left behind."

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