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Filing Divorce Papers

Filing divorce papers is the first step in the divorce process.  States require that you or your spouse meet the residency requirement of that state in order to have jurisdiction over your divorce.  The amount of time needed to qualify as a resident varies from state to state, so you will need to check your individual state laws to verify that you meet the requirements. 

If you and your spouse live in different states, it is possible to file in either state if you both meet the residency requirements of that state.  Once residency requirements are met and jurisdiction is decided, the divorce petition needs to be completed.  This document states the names of the parties involved in the divorce (including children), the proposed property division, child custody and support, and any other information relevant to the divorce. 

From there, the divorce papers are filed in the courthouse of the county that will have jurisdiction over the case, and a copy of the petition is served on your spouse.  Since getting the petition started and filing divorce papers can be complicated, many people choose to have a lawyer handle the process for them.  Of course, you always have the option of handling the divorce yourself, but be prepared to do a lot of paperwork and research.  For more information about how to file for divorce, read over the frequently asked questions below:

Can I file for divorce even if my spouse doesn't consent?

Cheryl's Question: I have given my husband the settlement agreement papers two months ago and he has done nothing (I don't believe that he plans to).  Can I just file with the court even if he doesn't respond? 

Brette's Answer:  You need to talk to an attorney in your state about your state's laws and procedures. You don't need your spouse's consent to get a divorce though - if you want one, you can go file now.   »Return to top

Can I get a divorce without notifying my spouse?

Mona's Question: I would like to know how a Divorce is obtained when the other party is not notified?

Brette's Answer:  You always must notify the other party. However if you are unable to locate him after reasonable efforts, the court will permit notification by publication. You publish a notice in a newspaper chosen by the court and wait to see if the other party responds. If not, the case proceeds without him.  Click on the following link to read more about notify your spouse that a divorce has been started.

How do I file for divorce if I don't know where my spouse is?

Raquel's Question: I left my husband and have no idea where he is or how to get a hold of him. It's been over two years. What do I do to get the divorce process started?

Brette's Answer:  You need to find out what the process is in your state, but generally you would file then get permission from the court to serve him via publication if you cannot locate him. »Return to top

Do I need my marriage license to file for a divorce?

Roseann's Question: Do I need to show my marriage certificate in order to get a divorce?

Brette's Answer:  In most places you do not, however you do need to be able to list the date and place of the marriage.

Can I file an uncontested divorce is there's nothing to divide?

Liz's Question: My husband and I have lived apart for nearly two years. We have not been intimate for a year now, live in different places, and have out own lives. Someone said that I can just file uncontested papers at the courthouse? Is that possible? I don't want anything from him.

Brette's Answer:  Yes, an uncontested divorce is always an option. Get the packet from your court clerk or your state's court web site.

In which state should I file for a divorce?

Mary Ellen's Question:  If I got married in one but now we live in another state, where do I file for a divorce?

Brette's Answer:  You file in the state you currently reside in. Be aware though that most states have a residency requirement  that requires either that you live there for several months, or that the reason for the divorce arose in the state. »Return to top

Where do I file if my children were born in different states?

Khouri's Question: I have lived in my state for about 7 months, and gave birth to our third child while here. My husband still resides in a different state. Does giving birth to a child in another state cause an issue about where I should file? 

Brette's Answer:  It doesn't matter where your children were born. Residency requirements will govern where you file for divorce.

Does it matter if he files in a different county than I live?

Crystal's Question: My husband moved me and the kids into an apartment 200 miles away and told us he was being transferred soon, to get settled and enroll in school. Now he has just told me he is going to file for divorce.  Does it matter if he files in a different county than I live? I am looking into lawyers here where I live, but if he files where he lives will I have to travel for this and get a different lawyer? 

Brette's Answer:  I'm sorry to hear about your predicament. One thing you can do is file in family court where you are now for custody, child support and spousal support. This will help you get on your feet financially. Where the divorce should be heard is a jurisdiction or venue question. If you're in the same state, then it can likely be heard in either county. Since it would be a hardship for you to travel to his locale, you have a good argument for a transfer to where you are, as long as you meet the residency requirements. Your other option is file yourself for divorce. You need to talk to an attorney who can help you through these decisions. Call the bar association and ask for a referral. Good luck.  »Return to top

Can I file for divorce in the US even if I married in another country?

SJC's Question: I was married in the Virgin Islands and live in United States now.  Is it possible to file for an uncontested divorce in the United States? 

Brette's Answer:  Yes, as long as you meet the residency requirements of the state you live in.

How to handle filing divorce papers if you have dual-citizenship

Andrea's Question: I have residency in both the United States and Ontario, Canada. Is there one location that is typically better for me to get divorced in?

Brette's Answer:  You would need to either consult an attorney in each location or talk to one attorney who practices in both areas. What you want is a comparison of what the laws in each locale would entitle you to, so that you could choose the place that will be most favorable for filing divorce papers. Even though you are a resident of both places, you need to make sure that you meet the divorce residency requirements of each locale, as this is a different legal concept. »Return to top

How can I find out if my husband has filed for a divorce?

Maureen's Question: How can I find out if my husband filed for divorce?

Brette's Answer:  You would need to be served with papers for the divorce to be legal. If you're worried perhaps that you should have been served and wasn't, go to the court clerk's office in the county he lives in and ask for a search using your name. You should also check in your county if you live in two different places. »Return to top

How can I find out if my lawyer filed the divorce papers?

Sherry's Question: How can I find out if my attorney really filed divorce papers without running back and forth to court.

Brette's Answer:  Call your attorney and ask for a copy of the receipt.

Why would someone file for divorce, but not serve the petition?

Andrea's Question: Why would someone file for divorce, but never serve papers to the spouse? Do the papers have to be served to the spouse and recorded in the court for a divorce to proceed?

Brette's Answer:  Papers do have to be served for a case to continue. There are many reasons a person might file and then not follow through - running out of money, changing their mind, being unsure how to handle service and so on.  »Return to top

Can he file for divorce if I've already filed, but not served the papers?

Jacqueline's Question: I filed for a divorce but I have not had my husband served because I am starting to have second thoughts. The paralegal group I went through said they will put it on hold until I decide to serve him (which I have 2 years). Can he file for divorce from me even though I already filed but have not had him served yet?

Brette's Answer:  If you have already opened a case, in most states he can file another one, but they cases will get combined into one action. »Return to top

Can I file for divorce in my home state even though my husband has already filed in another state?

Maggie's Question: My soon-to-be ex has filed for a divorce in the state that he is currently living in, but the courts have kicked back our uncontested cased for over a year.  I have signed the papers and I want to have this finalized.  Can I go ahead and file for divorce in my home state, even though the original divorce is being processed in another state?

Brette's Answer:  Probably not. If there is a case already in progress in another state where there is jurisdiction it is unlikely your state would let you move forward. You can focus on getting the divorce finalized where it is already in progress. It sounds like you have much of the work done already. If you're frustrated with the process you could always file a counter-petition in the same case to try to get things to move forward. Find out what the problem is with the current paperwork and work to get it resolved. It might be worth a few hundred dollars to consult with an attorney who could take a look at it and tell you what's wrong.   »Return to top

What if one spouse files for divorce, but the other refuses to sign?

Jade's Question: What happens when one spouse files for divorce and the other spouse refuses to sign or accept the divorce?

Brette's Answer:  The case moves forward. The judge decides if there will be a divorce or not.

What can I do if filed for a divorce, but now want to stop it?

June's Question: I filed for a divorce and my husband received the service, but completed it incorrectly, so the court sent it back to him.  I now want to stop the divorce.  How do I do this, as I don't have any legal representation? 

Brette's Answer:  Call the court clerk and ask what procedure to follow to withdraw the case.  »Return to top

Related Articles:
How to Serve Divorce Papers
How To Get A Divorce
Also see:
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Brette Sember is a former family and matrimonial attorney and mediator, nationally recognized expert, and author of many books including The Divorce Organizer & Planner, No-Fight Divorce, and How To Parent With Your Ex. For more information about Brette, see www.BretteSember.com.

This column provides general information about the various aspects of divorce.  It is not intended to take the place of legal counsel and should not be considered personal legal advice.  For specific recommendations concerning your situation, please retain experienced legal counsel.  WomansDivorce.com and Brette Sember disclaim any liability from any claim arising from any information contained in this column. This column is not a substitute for legal advice.

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